I neglect your Word and turn my eyes upon the delights of mine own desires, my thoughts dwell in the places of mankind.
Why do I constantly turn away from you?
I know within myself that your goodness does not flow from these and yet I constantly stray from your fount.
My deepest desire is to be a peace with you and to honor you, so why do I not do what will bring this about?
Father, please turn your face from my despicable behavior and only return to me once I have returned to you, yet I fear just that.
That you will finally give me a just punishment, yet your mercy and grace continually abound in my life and instead you remind me of your deep deep love and care for me.
Oh, how can I bear this joyous burden?
My soul doesn't know.
Shall I weep in relief or in sorrow?
For I know I do not deserve such goodness nor can I repay such a debt.
Humbly I raise my hands in worship and surrender: Take life, forgive me for trying to live without you.
Repair my heart and grant me wisdom to take each new step in accordance with your plans and not my own.
Letting you have your rightful place as the author of my life for no one knows me like you do.
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